Monday, March 29, 2010

still wandering

Well, still feel like a lone wanderer.  I feel God's presence when I am paying attention.  That's the key, you know...   Some moments I am more aware of Him than others.   You still just want to be hugged though, you know?  Or cuddled or held or kissed or even NOTICED for that matter... But, I am learning so many things in this season.  Contentment.  Joy.  Peace.  Trust.  Tenacity.  Patience.  Patience. Patience
I will say there seems to be a theme right now with my intolerance button...  It's fakeness.  I have zero tolerance for it.  I'm finding myself very angry at times with people who represent themselves in one way and completely act another.  whether in closed doors or just bluntly out in the open.  My question is WHY?   Why do people do this?  I know the saying that hurt people hurt people...  But, that's just not good enough for me these days...
If you're a fish, be a fish.  If you are a morning person, be a morning person.  If you like painting, then paint.  If you are a jerk, BE A JERK.  If you're not sorry, then don't say it.  If you really want to BE something then, BE it!  all this hem-hawing around is getting on my nerves.  I'm ready for some black and white kind of people, you know?  TRUTH, TRUTH, TRUTH.  Why is everyone so afraid of it?  What is the matter with people????  I have asked this question 30 times this past week if not 300!!!
This is not coming from a self-righteous heart because with me... what you see is what you get!  I am not trying to be something that I am not.  I know, I know, I am totally on a soap box right now!!!  Isn't that what blogging is for?  ha ha.  I'm just tired of this affecting me and the ones I love.
It's soooo old.  That's what I want to ask a 'fake' person... "Does this ever get old to you? Do you ever get tired of yourself?"
Ok. I will climb down off of the box now.
I am, however, excited about many things right now.  I will find out here in a few weeks if I made it into the New York Marathon!!!   YEAH!  Just finished Lexington's first half with about 30 other running for the refuge runners!  I am not sure yet how much we raised. Summer is getting closer!  And I will be laying on a Florida Beach in 6 weeks...  Oh my GOSH!!!!
Blessings to you all!